Emotion vs Logic

A friend of ours informed us that her husband suggested buying a dog for their boys for Christmas.

According to her, "He has said, for all the years I have known him, that we will never, EVER own a dog.  He has a list of reasons why.

Photo by M.G.M.

1. They're expensive.
2. You can't go out of town without dealing with them.
3. They poop in your yard.
4. They're expensive
5. They eat everything.
6. They require exercise.
7. They leave hair everywhere.
8. They're expensive.
Oh! and, 9. They're expensive."

I reminded them of a few other reasons:

10. They chew up your furniture,
11. They crap in the house, not just the yard,
12. You have to pull big fat ticks off of them.

She told me there were actually more like 100 reasons, but she didn't want to take the time to list them all.

This is a perfect example of making a decision based purely on emotion instead of logic.  It is the kind of decision you may regret later once the emotion of the moment has passed.  It is the kind of decision emotional people make, and logical people frown upon.  It is the kind of decision that often causes you to murmur "What was I thinking!"

But it's also the kind of decision that makes us human.  It's what makes us interesting beings.  It's what makes life enjoyable.  Sometimes the situation requires one to say "The heck with logic."  A world without such emotional decisions would be a boring place in which to live.

Good decision, Steve.

The Leap onto Facebook

I finally set up a Facebook account yesterday after years of avoiding it.


I had a list of reasons not to make the leap, which includes, but is not limited to, the following:

• I tend to compulsively do certain things, like checking my e-mail.  I don't want to become a compulsive Facebook checker.
• While I would like to apply the above guideline, I don't want to come across as someone who ignores other Facebook people.  So I will have to check my Facebook account at least occasionally to avoid such an offense.
• This may lead to the compulsive behavior in item one above.
• I have heard that Facebook may have the tendency to lead you to interact with many people on a causal level, but take away time from interaction with the people who are really close to you.  By nature, I tend to interact intensely with a few people.  So Facebook may cause my head to blow up or something.
• I enjoy more in-depth written communication, with pictures and many words, which is why I blog.  But nobody has any time or interest in lengthy blog entries, especially mine.  People apparently prefer short bursts of communication like the ones you see on Facebook.  So to conform to this current social phenomenon, I have elected to join the masses.

There is a list to make the leap, which includes, but is not limited to, the following:

• I intend to trick Facebook users into going to my blog, which is my real passion, by updating with links to my blog.  I'm not sure if this is a Facebook no-no or not.
• I was once sarcastically accused of "Being too cool to be on Facebook."  Perhaps I deserved that sarcasm, and intend to remedy the situation. 
• Maybe I need to get out more.
• According to Mr. Rogers, we are all just a little different and special.  So I intend to apply my own take to Facebook, because I'm different, and special too.

"And that's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown."

Today we celebrate the receiving of two very special gifts - one which changed our lives forever, and one which changes the way we look at snowmen forever.

Thanks to Keith Lankford from The Red Barn Country Store in Georgetown, DE for the special surprise in my stocking.

Intangible Rewards

It's been exactly two weeks since the race.  Good sense tells me that posts about running are off limits.  But I never claimed to have good sense all the time. (Stay with me here, this isn't really a post about running.)

It took about a week to get over the soreness of the race.  I did my first run afterwards on the the following Monday - eight minutes of painful and tender hobbling along.  By Friday, everything was back in order.

Of more significance, however, has been my state of mind since the race.  I anticipated it happening...it's a very common occurrence.  I spent months having been consumed with the training and the anticipation of the race, and then, on December 9, it's done.  As I fully expected, the euphoria of completing the task was very short lived.

If you have followed my blogging about the race, you may have been tempted to admire the effort of the training.  But here's an ironic take on that.  The effort came easy, because there was a clear task at hand.  In training for such a huge task, there is no option to skip a run.  I considered every run as absolutely necessary, even the short ones.

Now that a clear goal is no longer there, it is much easier to skip runs.  It takes much more effort now to run than it did before the race.

And herein lies some sort of great life lesson, which I am still working to solidify in my mind.

The lesson has something to do with the value of plugging away at some effort that is completely worthy - like routine running, but without the marathon goal.  Routine running has a long list of positive effects.  The reward is not necessarily immediate or tangible.  But it is worthy, nevertheless.

There must be a whole bag full of such endeavors.  They are completely worthy (much more so than running), but their reward is not necessarily immediate or tangible.  It is these things that require an incredible amount of mental energy.  But you may never be able to connect a short term goal with them, such as a marathon.

March 2006

A few things come to mind, but I'm sure there are more.  The first and most obvious one is child rearing.  Day after day after day, parents (mostly mothers) plug away at one of the most worthy endeavors of all - the influencing of another little human being - expending incredible amounts of energy.  How that little person turns out has everything to do with the day to day grind of motherhood.  Of course, this is not to say that the mother is responsible for everything the child does later in life.  But she has a position of influence like no other person in the world.  For the most part, she has no big goal like a marathon that can be finished.  She just plugs away, never having the satisfaction of passing some point of completion.  She is always a mother.

Another thing that comes to mind is work.  Yes, it is rewarding for some.  But for others, it requires an incredible amount of energy to do it day after day, with no great reward.  Sure, there is immediate financial compensation, but perhaps it is just adequate, or worse - less than adequate.  But they plug away anyway, because it is worthy.  This is more admirable than running a marathon.

Perhaps something else comes to your mind.  Perhaps you have watched someone who presses on day by day in some endeavor which has no immediate or tangible reward.  And you admire them for that.  In the Spirit of Christmas, perhaps you should tell them.

PBS Digital Studios Remixes

I listen to a lot of Public Broadcasting.  They tell me Public Broadcasting is liberal.  I have some friends who won't listen to it for that reason.  I'm afraid I don't get that argument, and listen frequently anyway.  The other day I heard a discussion about these videos.  They took voices of PBS icons and brilliantly mixed them into songs. (The song starts after a short introduction with just talking.)

I grew up watching Bob Ross.  I never once did any painting, since my brother Buddy got all the talent in that department and anything I ever drew looked pitiful compared to his work.  Ross had a way about him that was mesmerizing.  Part of if was his voice that induced a trance, the other part was was his hair, which you couldn't take your eyes off.

And then there was Mr. Rogers.  I watched him even though I was older than his target age.  Mr. Rogers also had a way of inducing a trance with his voice as well.  He is probably responsible for calming down thousands of kids with ADHD.

And I watched Julia Child occasionally as well.  Again, I never cooked one thing.  I wonder what percentage of viewers actually did after watching her?  Perhaps this is an argument against worrying about the impact of TV on kids.

Classic Texting Misunderstanding

I set out for work.  It wasn't all that cold, but I was uncomfortable nevertheless.  I received a text from a friend, referring to a conversation we had the previous day about this friend getting back into running. 

Friend:  "I have decided that I would rather have the accomplishment of running without all the work and discipline beforehand."

It was apparent the discussion about my friend's future career in running was finished, so I took the conversation in a different direction, and threw in a reference to the fact we both enjoy soup on chilly, overcast days.

Brent:  "I have decided I need some body fat for the winter, or a lot of soup."

Long pause.

Friend:  "Why the fat person?"

What?  That response made no sense whatsoever.  This happens to me more than I care to admit.  I go off in a direction in a conversation, and fail to give the other person adequate clues as to where I'm going.  I guessed it had happened again. So I made an effort to clarify.

Brent:  "I'm cold, and I didn't say fat person."

Friend:  "Oh! :) I read that as somebody fat... you shouldn't have done all that running."

Hmmm.  So ...  I had communicated that I need somebody fat for the winter.  I really need to work on my communication skills.

The Rehoboth Beach Seashore Marathon

After anticipating this day since late June, we set out from our house at 5:15 a.m. after about 6 hours of sleep and arrived in the sleepy town of Rehoboth Beach, DE for the Rehoboth Beach Seashore Marathon.

(Note:  clicking on the pictures will enlarge them.  Clicking on the links will take you to other pages.)

For those of you who want the Cliff Notes version:

• Event:  Rehoboth Beach Seashore Marathon
• Date:  December 8, 2012
• Weather:  52 degrees, heavily overcast, no rain
• Time to complete:  4 hours, 10 minutes, and 14 seconds
• Average pace:  9:33/mile
• Overall Finishing position:  430 out of 823 runners
• What I predicted:  525th, 4:08:00
• Finishing position in age group:  37 out of 68 runners
• Finishing position among males:  310 out of 517 runners
• Time for first half:  2:01:48
• Time for second half:  2:08:26
• Pace in first 6.55 miles - 9:02/mile
• Pace in first half - 9:18/mile
• Pace in second half - 9:49/mile
• Official Results from Lin-mark Sports. 
• Official Photos at US Candids (select Rehoboth Marathon 12/8/12 -search for bib #901) .
• The winner was a fellow we have met, Enos "E" Benbow Jr..  He finished in 2:45:21 with a pace of 6:19/mile.  E helped coach Sarah some when she ran track two years ago.

For those of you who were interested in the Strategy I mentioned in a previous post, here are the answers:

The Starting Line

- I didn't want to start out too fast.  Not a problem.  There were 2000 people crammed into a street about 50 yards in length behind the starting line, all waiting very patiently to begin.  This mass trudged along for quite some time, putting a harness on everyone's adrenaline.

- I intended to pick out a runner to run behind, who would help me keep pace.  I didn't really find this person, and ran behind various runners who never really fit the bill.  I did find one good prospect around mile 15. I had glanced at my watch, gave up on trying to do the math in my head, and asked a lady who met most of my criteria for the pacing partner.  Based on my quick math, I thought we were running at a pace to finish around 4 hrs, 15 minutes.  I asked if she was tracking her pace.  "No," she said, "But it feels like we are running to finish in about 4 hrs 10 minutes, maybe 4 hrs 15 minutes."  Great, just about what I thought.  Then I noticed that she had no fancy gadget.  In fact, she wasn't even wearing a watch.  She WAS the runner for whom I had been searching.  She had obviously done this a lot. (Note:  I discovered that it was Kristen Hine of Baltimore.  She finished 425th with a time of 4:09:32, 5 places and 42 seconds ahead of me.)

Mile 11.7 near the DQ in Lewes

- It didn't take long to realize that she was a faster runner than I was.  I consciously had to say to myself "Let her go, she's too fast for you."  So I did.  I don't know where she finished.  At that point in the race, I determined that a 4 hour finish time was probably out of reach, and I was perfectly content with that.




 - Finishing strong was important to me.  The last mile is perhaps the highlight of the race.  You know you are about to finish, and the joy of accomplishing the task sets in.  Almost got a cramp in my right calf because I picked up the pace in that mile, but I immediately slowed until I knew it was in check.  Then I passed 5 or 6 runners in the last stretch, awing the roaring crowd (O.K. So perhaps they weren't actually in awe, but I can believe what I want, cause it's my story.)

Mile 19.3, also near the DQ in Lewes

- The course, as expected, was spectacular.  And I enjoyed it the best I could.  But you are so focused on running that you have to almost force yourself to take it in.  Keep in mind that when you have a goal in mind for a specific finishing time, you are constantly having to push to run a little faster than you really want to.  If you are out for a casual jog, it is different.  You are doing this for hours on end.  It takes a lot of mental energy, believe it or not, and this is part of what makes the marathon a challenge.

For those of you wondering about my health:

- I felt great at the end of the race.  My only effects were a blister on one toe, and a little chafing under one arm.  Some soreness in my thighs set in around mile 20.  The next morning,  my thighs were sore, but just muscle soreness I would expect - nothing to indicate any kind of injury.

For those of you wondering what part of the marathon I liked best:

Family and Friends

- Sharing it with my friends and family.  This whole thing has been a big event in the the lives of our whole family since June.  Sure, you do something big and you want others to witness it... I can't deny that there is some of that sentiment, which is self-centered and in my view somewhat unattractive.  But that's not what I'm getting at in "sharing" it.  We are all involved in different things that are important to each one of us.  And we "share" those experiences with each other by talking about them - letting each other know what we are doing.  In doing that, we all get to experience the joy of the event.  A classic example is inviting others to our weddings.  It isn't a matter of "Look at what we've done," but rather "Come and experience the joy of our marriage."  Now of course, this particular event isn't on the level of a wedding, but it's the same idea.  It is the sharing of lives that brings joy to our hearts as social creatures.  It is that sharing which, in fact, makes us less self-centered, because others get to share our joy.

The Finish behind Rehoboth Beach Running Company

- In that light, I have to mention a few people by name.  Mom and Dad, Steve & Marcia Miller and their boys, Aleisa Timmons (Bud had to work), Kirk and Barbara Westfall, and Al Abrams of Sea Finds in Rehoboth all came to the race to cheer me on.  Tina's Aunt Helen showed unparalleled interest in the race from the very beginning, texted during the race for updates, and sent us a donation, which we used to buy breakfast afterwards at Sammy's Kitchen on Wilmington Avenue.   Rick Baker, who would have been there except for another commitment, called right after the race.  Bill Sammons of 88.7 The Bridge mentioned the marathon on his morning show last week.  None of these people have any particular interest in running.  If you aren't a runner, talk about running is just plain boring.  Watching it is boring as well.  This is what makes people who show interest and support all the more special.

Kirk, Mom, Barbara, Dad, Marcia & baby

Al Abrams

- Many others gave me their ear to talk about the race beforehand (well, they appeared to give me an ear... perhaps I just took it.)  This was important to me.  You can tell when someone expresses genuine interest in what you are doing.  And that says "I care about you... I want to know."  That is all part of that sharing.  And that's what I desire to do for those around me with whatever it is they are doing. 

Tina

For those of you who wonder what my family thought of the marathon:

Tina and the kids were all completely supportive.  They never once complained that my training was a nuisance, even though at times I know it was.  What can I say to that except thank you.  And thanks to the rest of you as well.

Best Christmas Decorations EVER Just Got Better.

Years ago, we made a  plywood cutout of a Nativity based on a Christmas card drawn by our friend Brooke Gehman.  The original stable went the way of all flesh (it rotted), and we replaced the stable a couple of years ago. 

 This year, we wanted to do something different, so Tina and Sarah drew animals on a piece of plywood, and poof... look what we we have now.

Note:  As you can see, for the benefit of those of you sick and tired of reading about running, this was not a running blog .  Nothing at all was mentioned about running in this blog.  Also, no animals were harmed in the making of this Nativity.  And yes, there WERE chickens at the manger (see "If Chickens Could Sing".)

Strategy

You may be wondering if I have some sort of strategy for running the marathon.  In fact, I do:

• Don't start out too fast.  I made this mistake in 2003.  It is easy to do with the adrenaline rush that comes at the start of the race.
• Once the mass of runners spreads out after a mile or so, I like to fall in behind someone who I judge to be a good runner.  These folks are easy to spot.  They dress in appropriate running wear, run with good form, appear comfortable with their pace, and often have interesting gadgets.  During the 1/2 marathon I ran in September, I found a lady who had a gps watch.  The watch tracked her pace, and she could tell at any point in time what pace she was running.
• The above person may be running at a slightly faster pace than I have typically trained at.  Trailing such a person serves to push you to run a little harder than you normally would.
• This strategy can backfire.  Part of the problem in 2003 was that I implemented this strategy and ended up choosing someone that was running too fast.
• I have in my head I want to finish in 4 hours, which is ambitious for my level of training.  I could avoid the whole issue by just lowering my goal time.  I'm hoping that I did learn one thing over the years.  That would be having the good sense to pick the right person to trail.  I was successful during the half marathon, so there is hope.  Often you end up changing the running partner if they become a poor match.
• I hope to finish strong.  If all goes as planned, I expect the most difficult portion of the race to be miles 20 to 23 (if the great difficulty comes before that, I'm in trouble).  After that, and new adrenaline rush begins to set in with the excitement of finishing the race.

 And that's about the sum of it.  Besides all that technical stuff, I plan to enjoy the run.  It's a beautiful course with scenery infinitely more interesting than the stretch on which I have been training.  The occasional chatting with fellow runners is always stimulating as well.  And the walking out (well, running out) of a dream I've been anticipating since June is just plain fun.