A Few Thoughts about Brother Dean

We just held a small private memorial service for my brother Dean.  Four of us shared a few brief comments.  I finished up with these thoughts:

When you get to be my age, you end up going to a lot of funerals. Because of that, and because of my own age, I have thought a lot about what my own funeral will be like. If I could attend, I would. 

So what would I want shared at my own funeral? I’ve thought about that, too. Just yesterday, I was chatting with a friend, and I quickly listed four things I would hope were said at my funeral about my life. I told this friend that I already have these things in my mind… they are already things I aspire to. So if nobody mentions them, it was all just talk. It wasn’t who I was, it was just who I wanted to be. 

But today isn’t about me, it’s about Dean. 

That leads me to this: What would Dean want said today about his life. What were the things he aspired to do? And did he do those things, or was it just talk? 

I’ll start with this comment… I have my own weaknesses, everyone here has their own weaknesses. That goes without being said. 

But we all also have strengths. And Dean had his. 

I want to point out just one. Dean had a heart for those who were struggling. It didn’t matter what the nature of the struggle was. The fact is, he felt the pain of those people. 

There’s a reason Dean was good at this… a reason he could empathize with those struggling. He struggled himself. He knew what it was like to battle problems, and even to loose some battles. He had been there. He had life experience. 

Anybody who knew Dean knows what I’m talking about. It’s already been mentioned. But I’ll give you another example. Years ago Dean wanted us to go over to Baltimore with him. He had prepared these paper bags with a few items… a sandwich, some socks, some gloves. Then we walked, and he would spot people he suspected were homeless. He was usually right. He knew those items would be valuable to those folks. He knew, because he had been there. 

Dean could have taken that life experience and done nothing good with it. Instead, I think he probably did what I started with a minute ago…he wondered what would be said about him when he was gone. I think he said to himself “I want people to remember me as an encourager, as someone who, without judgment, walked beside broken people, and maybe even made a difference. 

 Thank you Dean.  You did.

A Work in Progress

 

Let’s just get this out of the way first… everything is relative. You will understand what I’m getting at by this momentarily.

Let’s also get this out of the way.  This is not a how-to guide. It is not to promote some program.  It is not to sell you anything.  It’s just a portion of my life for the past 2 ½ years revolving around health.

Anyone who knows me is going to roll their eyes when you start to hear about my quest for better health.  That’s because throughout my life, I’ve had a slender build and have tried to stay fit.  I’ve been a runner for most of the years since graduating from college.  I’ve completed three marathons.  The first was in 1985 in San Antonio, TX, the second in 2003 in Long Branch, NJ, and the last in 2012 in Rehoboth Beach, DE. I became a runner for numerous reasons.  Running is easy, and takes little skill.  This was good for me because I have little athletic skill. That’s probably because I avoided athletics when I was in school.  That’s partly because I feared failure, I was awkward, and I had some pretty serious asthma as a youth. I enjoyed running, found that my slow twitch muscle fibers were suited for distance running, and as I mentioned, it required little skill (although being a good distance running does require huge amounts of good training and discipline.  Please hold the rocks.)  Having said all that, I probably would not have become the runner I did without the influence of my best friend Joe.  I became a serious runner because I enjoyed running with him.  He was my best man at our wedding. Despite always living in different parts of the country, we have maintained a great relationship to this day.  Hold that thought.

But before you stop reading because you don’t want to hear a relatively healthy guy discuss his health, just give me a minute to make my case.

Early in 2021, probably because of the new year, I started considering where I stood with my health. I was hardly doing anything in regard to exercise. I had dropped back from running for a few reasons. It didn’t feel like it used to.  I was no longer light on my feet.  My stride had become short, with my feet barely coming off the ground.  Occasionally I would drag the ball of my left foot on the ground.

On January 25th, 2021, I started doing push-ups.  I’ve gone through stretches of push-ups in the past.  It was an easy way to incorporate one physical activity into my day.  I could just move from my computer to a space in our bedroom and do them.  It was an easy first step.

Later in March, I added some curls.  I had a set of dumbbells, and I kept these beside my computer and could do the curls about the time I did the push-ups… anything to make it convenient and right in my face.  By the beginning of April, I was doing about 100 push-ups a day over three sets (33 push-ups x 3).

Then I got a wake-up call. On April 13, I had some blood work done for a life insurance policy we were getting.  My cholesterol was at 220, the highest it had ever been.  My weight was at 187, also the highest it has ever been.  

My weight had been bothering me.  I wasn’t happy about the typical extra weight around my waist that you see in older men. But besides the appearance, I could feel it.  I felt it when I bent over to tie my shoes.  I felt it if I leaned over to the side. I felt it in my feet late in the day.

Perhaps of greater concern was some sciatica pain I would get in my left foot if I stretched towards it from my waist. I wasn’t sure what the cause of that was, but it was probably related to my back.  I have struggled with lower back pain for much of my married life. I was once told years ago that my lower back was a little askew in a scoliosis sort of way. I had never been diagnosed, but I had a suspicion I had suffered at least a couple times from bulging discs.  My back was prone to soreness, especially if I tried to lift something with my arms outstretched in front of me.  After one particularly serious injury, I had learned to lift with the weight close to my belly. Lifting almost always caused me to pause and assure myself I was lifting correctly.

Because of these events and circumstances, my health was very much in the forefront of my daily thoughts. I wanted to feel better, but I also had another motive.  I began to consider my work, and the fact some things were becoming increasingly more difficult, like lifting an extension ladder and putting it on my truck rack, or lifting a piece of ¾” plywood, or picking up anything with a significant amount of weight and moving it. These were things I did regularly.  My back especially concerned me.  I played out a scenario in my head of what would happen if I seriously injured it. I’m the main breadwinner in our family, and self-employed.  If I hurt myself while working, there would be no bread from me.

Even more than those work-related things though, I begin to consider the importance of my health for my own family.  I considered my responsibilities, both now and in the future.  I considered that I wanted to be able to physically do what lay in my future. I wanted to feel good in doing that, both physically and mentally. I didn’t want energy and resources used to deal with my own health issues in the future if there were things I could do now to prevent that.

My mindset wasn’t so much about longevity of my life, although that would be a nice perk, but it was as much about quality of life.  If there are things I can choose to do now which will avoid issues in the future like going on medication, or medical procedures, or surgery, then I wanted to do those things.  Obviously it doesn’t guarantee anything, but not doing anything almost guarantees at least some result I don’t want.

I had my annual physical on June 5, 2021.  Not good.  My weight was down a little, to 180. My total cholesterol was at 222, and my total glucose was at 99.  Had it been 100, I would have fallen into the category of “pre-diabetic”.  My doctor wasn’t terribly concerned.  He asked me about exercise.  I explained I still ran some.  He had been suggesting for the past few years that I stop running due to the stress on my back.  He was a big proponent of walking.  Having run for most of my life, I was not big at all on walking.  Psychologically, it just seemed like giving up.

In a bit of a panic, I consulted with a friend of ours – Dawn, the mother of our son-in-law.  We discussed my health and paths I could take to improve it.  One of the things we discussed was intermittent fasting. I vaguely recall that conversation… she suggested I do some research on it, which I did.  

Part of the value of fasting is weight loss, of course, but even more importantly is that the fasting has other effects.  According to the theory, it can help re-set your blood sugar level and it can help reduce inflammation.  There is a process which occurs in the body which is brought on by the fasting.  We suspected I had some inflammation because of the symptoms I exhibited, such as a sore back.  The whole science of inflammation and fasting is way above my head, but I trusted Dawn.

After looking at ways to fast intermittently, I chose a fast that lasts from dinner of one day to dinner on the next.  Basically you don’t eat breakfast and lunch.  I tried it one day, (June 10, 2021 to be exact) and found that it wasn’t all that difficult.  Around lunch, I’d drink something, and often end up having a cup of coffee to fend off hunger, which worked really well. Once I got going, I fasted about three days a week.

Coinciding with the start of the fasting, I made a pretty drastic lifestyle change – I stopped getting sugary snacks… one of my worst vices.  I would sometimes stop mid-morning AND mid-afternoon and get something like a Ho-Ho, or a fruit pie, or something with an insane amount of processed sugar and fat.  That and a cup of coffee would instantly give me a jolt of energy and boost my mood…. every…single…time.  It was the closest thing I did to doing drugs. In reality, the sugar and the caffeine were a drug to me. I knew it was unhealthy.  I also knew I couldn’t moderate it… heck, just ONE of those every few days was awful for my health.  So I stopped cold turkey with the sugar fix.  When I stopped for a cup of coffee, I would either just get coffee, or pick up a banana. After a short while, the habit was broken. I haven’t looked back since, except for an occasional treat while traveling.  I get a special dispensation when traveling.

My workout routine was still very scant in volume, but at least regular. In July, I added an overhead press to my brief work-out.  In my mind, my priority at the time was weight loss.  I wanted to shed all those Ho-Ho’s and fruit pies.  And it worked….slowly.  My weight dropped about a pound a week.  

As the summer went on, I became increasingly focused on my weight, and less so on the exercising.  I took note of the hunger I would feel.  As a privileged American, hunger wasn’t something I had experienced, ever.  I wanted to feel what it was like.  Now of course, my experience was limited, and the hunger was always satisfied by the end of the day.  

By mid-October, and about 4 months after starting the fasting, my weight had dropped to about 160 lbs.  I had dropped roughly 20 pounds since the start of the fasting.

I figured my weight was at a good place to start re-building muscle.  I had probably lost some muscle along with the fat. The last place I could visibly see it was mostly around my waist.  That was annoying, because that’s where I noticed it the most from the very beginning.  So I pressed on past 160 lbs.  Part of my thought was that I would probably never do this again – drop so much weight at once - and there was an opportunity here to experience something I never would again.  

One of those experiences I wanted was to understand was what it’s like to try to loose weight when it’s difficult.  Up to this point, dropping to 160 wasn’t all that difficult, believe it or not.  I felt like I was now at the place where many people find themselves – wanting to loose weight, but not being able to.

Another thing I began to think about was whether I could begin to understand the mind of someone with anorexia.  I had been at this for long enough that fasting had become habitual.  I knew I was slender.  Once in a while I would see someone I hadn’t in a while, and they would ask if I had lost weight, in an alarmed sort of way. I wasn’t even sure what they saw that made them aware of it.  I didn’t necessarily take pleasure in hearing this, because the implication was that I appeared unhealthy. Never in my mind was I actually concerned about anorexia for myself, but I did begin to understand the satisfaction of limiting my food intake to give me the result of losing weight.  I began to understand that this was something I could control.  It was completely in my hands (an idea I’ve heard expressed concerning anorexia).  If I wanted to lose more weight, I probably could.

I don’t recall if I had a target weight.  It may have been about 155 lbs.

Those last pounds were by far the most challenging to lose.  I was much hungrier than I had been.  I felt fine, but I could feel my body rebelling against losing any more weight.  On February 18, 2022, I hit my lowest weight at 149.6 lbs. Since my highest recorded weight in April of 2021, I had lost about 35 lbs. At that point, I knew at least part of my experiment had reached its conclusion.

I’m not suggesting I did all this perfectly, or in the best and healthiest manner.  I could have incorporated a broader exercise routine during the time I was dropping weight, but I was more focused just on lowering my calorie intake and losing what I perceived as extra fat. I wanted to give my whole body a jolt, which would hopefully help with my cholesterol, blood sugar, and inflammation.

At this point there was a shift in my mindset.  In my head I had created a clean slate, and was prepared to start building on that.  So I began to incorporate a broader exercise program, and diverted my attention from weight loss to building muscle.

One weekend when Asher was home, he asked if I had seen the “Bring Sally Up” challenge.  It wasn’t familiar to me.  The challenge is basically a series of push-ups with holds in the up and down position, done to a song.  It’s only about 30 push-ups, but it’s terribly difficult to complete.  I figured it would be a challenge I could attain, since my weight was at its lowest in years, and I had been doing push-ups consistently for over a year. On April 1, 2022 I made my first attempt, and got 1 minute and 50 seconds into the 3 minute, 15 second challenge before I had to stop.

I knew I needed to add some other exercises to build muscle to complete the challenge.  I discussed it with Asher, and I also contacted a young guy I knew from when he was a student with our high school marching band.  Nino does some personal training, so I figured he could help.  He was more than willing to help, suggested 3 or 4 upper body exercises, and cautioned me to be careful as I incorporated them (due to my age and the vulnerability of my shoulders).

Before I stopped fasting on a regular basis, I wanted to see where my numbers stood after 10 months of pretty consistent intermittent fasting. I used a service called “Life Extension”, and had the blood drawn at our local LabCorp around April 13, 2022.

When the results came back, I was disappointed, to say the least.  My cholesterol had dropped 2 points to 220, and my total glucose had dropped just 3 points to 96.  I expressed my disappointment to Dawn.  “At least it isn’t going up!” she responded.  I just couldn’t wrap my head around why the numbers weren’t better, except for the fact my average cholesterol since 1999 was 196, and my average glucose level since 2004 was 91.

Around June, Asher suggested adding a few more weight training exercises.  He divided my routine up into “push” days and “pull” days. My workouts slowly grew in duration, and I increased the weight I was using periodically the way Asher suggested.

I steadily worked on the Bring Sally Up Challenge.

I would do it every other day, two times on  those days.  On June 2, 2022, I completed the challenge for the first time.  I kept at it and completed it for the 7th time on August 23, 2022. By September, I decided to stop doing the challenge.  I was devoting more and more time to my other weight workouts.  I realized that the challenge required a combination of very specific training – both strength and endurance, and I didn’t want to continue the endurance part. To continue to be able to complete the challenge wasn’t sustainable without a whole lot of effort.  The challenge had served its purpose.  It had given me a lofty goal, and it had spurred me on to devote time to weight training. Plus, it was just plain fun and rewarding to have completed it.

To backtrack just a little here, I had my annual physical on June 9, 2022. Some good news, some bad news.  My cholesterol was at 210, my glucose at 100. My records aren't clear, but the best I can recall, partly because I had no interest in loosing any more weight, and partly because of this blood work and my previous blood work in April, I stopped fasting. My weight was then about 155 lbs.

I haven’t mentioned yet that Asher has been weight training for a few years. He started under some experienced weightlifters, and over time, he picked up a lot of information from his own research.  Just looking at him was enough to tell me he knew what he was doing. Around this time, Asher mentioned some guys he had been listening to and watching on-line.  The name of their business was “MindPump”, run by Sal Di Stefano, Adam Schafer, Justin Andrews, and Doug Egge. The MindPump guys focus on a wide variety of things, including weight training, diet, mental health, even family life. Asher found the basics of a training program for free – the MAPS Anabolic Phase 1.  It was a full body workout which is done 3 days a week.  We decided to do it together.

 

www.mindpumpmedia.com/ 

I needed a lot of help.  There are so many ways to do weight training wrong. At my age, and with the state of my back, I was extremely cautious. There was nothing like having Asher show me a skill, and then watch as I did it.

I’m convinced Asher is a born teacher.  He seems to teach with a natural ability.  A big part of this is his attitude and how he instructs.  One day he showed me a lift. I watched him, then picked up the equipment and started to try to duplicate what he had done.  He immediately says “Dad… no, no, stop, STOP… you are doing practically EVERYTHING wrong”.  I burst out laughing.  He had said this with his easy-going way, and somehow managed to do it and crack me up at the same time.  It was a testament to his teaching skill.

Eventually Asher got me doing the whole MAPS Anabolic Phase 1 program.  The lift that concerned me the most was the deadlift, naturally because of my back.  It was similar to the motion which has resulted in the worst of my back related problems.  Similar, but not exact.  The deadlift, if done correctly, doesn’t put pressure on your back the way lifting something in front of you with outstretched arms does. Asher drilled home the idea to focus on form, and to not worry about trying to lift a lot of weight.  He said it a lot, and I listened.  To this day, I think about form habitually with just about every kind of lift I do.

Around this time, I chatted with Gray Scott about training.  Gray was working on his Exercise Physiology Degree, and doing some personal training.  He encouraged me to keep at it, gave me a few tips, and was especially pleased I wasn’t avoiding the deadlift. Just his talking to me about my efforts was a huge encouragement.

For Christmas, Asher and I invested in a few programs from MindPump.  The programs were extensive and well laid out.  Videos were included to show the proper form. By mid-December of 2022, I moved on to Phase II of the MAPS Anabolic Program.

I listened to the MindPump guys do their podcoast quite a bit. One of the things they discuss frequently is how your body adapts to exercise.   In one discussion, they discussed why weight training is so good for you, especially if you were just going to do one form of exercise.  They also discussed what some other forms of exercise can do to your body if done exclusively.  It was during this discussion I had an ah-ha moment concerning running.

I had been distance running pretty consistently from about the time I got out of college to about 2020, roughly 37 years. When I ran with Joe in my youth, we had incorporated many different activities into our lives – biking, swimming, tennis, and racquetball. But now, besides having a job that required constant physical activity, running had really been my only form of exercise for much of my married life. The one exception was some occasional biking. The cardio aspect of running is unsurpassed, but if you consider the idea of adaptation, running alone was causing my body to adapt to a very specific thing – running.  So what the body does when all you do is run is to become extremely efficient at running.  That means any muscles not used for distance running are really just extra baggage, so they drop in weight to the minimum.  It’s easier to propel a lighter body for long distances, and muscles weigh more than fat, so guess what you lose? Upper body strength?  Distance runners don’t really need it.  How about the muscles used to pick your leg up to your waist?  You don’t do that in distance running… unnecessary.  Squatting?  You never squat while running.  That, at least, is the theory of how your body adapts to running.  In practice, all those things were evident with me… low upper body strength, squatting was difficult (with no weight, let alone with weight). And that gate I mentioned earlier?  I’m convinced the occasional foot dragging I mentioned before was my body lifting my foot the bare minimum to propel it forward. In other words, I may have done my heart good, but I had possibly done a good part of the rest of my body a disservice by only running for so long.

It was this kind of information that confirmed in my mind that I was on the right track.  It didn’t mean I never intended to run again, just that I would never do it exclusively.

One of the things I learned from running is the problem of doing too much too soon.  Even though you may feel like you can increase distance, if you do it too quickly, it’s easy to injure yourself.  The most common problem I ran into was shin splints.   It’s difficult to know how quickly to increase your training.  You want to progress, but you have to be careful.

I knew this about running, and I knew the same principle applied to weight training.  So I was careful about increasing weight and repetitions.  It’s difficult to know when your muscles are just sore in a healthy way, and when you are doing too much.  Not surprisingly, I made a mistake early in 2023.  I had noticed some tenderness in my left elbow.  Eventually it worked its way up my forearm, and I would notice it when doing certain exercises, like the dumbbell curl.  I thought I could work through it, as it wasn’t really painful, just sore and tender.  I was wrong.

I had met a physical therapist through a friend of mine, and eventually ended up doing some work on his house. I mentioned it to Patrick, and he invited me right over.  He quickly surmised that I had tendonitis, an inflammation of the tendons in my left arm.  I had suspected as much. He suggested several things to do for it – icing whenever I could, using Biofreeze, using a compression sleeve, and, for a season, complete rest.  I knew he would say rest, and had resisted talking to him about it for that reason. I resisted this because I know how hard it is to build a good habit, and how easily it is to loose that habit. But I had no choice.  Starting January 31, I took the next 4 weeks off, completely.  I even had to be careful how I lifted things for work, as I could feel the discomfort with certain movements.

Ironically, this turned out to be a blessing.  One of the programs the MindPump guys have is a long series of mobility and stretching exercises.. a routine they called PRIME. I knew for a fact my mobility was poor, but I had neglected to bother with the PRIME routine because I was too intent on the lifting.  Thanks to an injury, I was basically forced into doing them.  As soon as I started, my lack of mobility and lack of balance between my left and right sides was evident. I worked exclusively on the program through the end of February.  

By March, I was chomping at the bit to start lifting again. On March 1, I resumed just the lower body exercises but used much lighter weights. I also started some exercises specifically for my arm in the middle of March. Any time I felt it aggravating my arm, I backed off.

Finally around April 10, 2023, I resumed my full workout, slowly easing back into it with lighter weight.  My arm was much better, and I only occasionally noticed a little tenderness just at my elbow.

On June 12, 2023, I had my annual physical and associated bloodwork. My total cholesterol was down to 201 (from 210 a year before and 222 two years before) and my total glucose was down to 93 (from 100 a year before).  My weight was a comfortable 165 lbs., hopefully some of that muscle.  Since I had expressed concern about my glucose level, my doctor ordered an A1C test for the first time, and it came back at 5.6%... right at the edge of the spectrum before being considered pre-diabetes. I was pleased with the progress of the cholesterol and glucose levels. But I still have work to do.

Again, my doctor asked about exercise.  He again suggested walking for cardio.  I again rejected that idea.  But I got the message.  Right about this time, I started biking, with the goal to bike about 3 of the 4 off days from weight training.  

That brings us up to present day – June 24, 2023. I’ve written this narrative for several reasons, the first of which is for my own recollection.  I had forgotten how long I had been at this.  I wanted to reflect on the path, and see if there was anything I could glean from that reflection. I wondered if I could nail down key ideas that have helped me along the way.

There are a couple of big areas to discuss.  Let’s start with the results thus far of the last 2 ½ years of all this.

Do I look any different?  To be completely honest…if you were to see me on the street… not much. That’s partly why this post is devoid of any pictures. It also detracts from why I have been doing what I’m doing in the first place.

Do I feel like I’ve got that huge amount of energy you always hear people talk about when they get into some health kick?  Well… honestly I would not put it that way. I have always been a low energy person. The one exception is when I drink a lot of coffee and eat a lot of sugar… at the same time.  And that’s what got me into this mess to begin with. So I typically plug along with a moderate amount of energy.  

Well what did I get out of this?  Plenty.

I’m definitely stronger than I was, across the board.  Compared to Asher, I’m a weakling.  But compared to where I was before, there IS no comparison.  I live in a 62 year old body that has been (and this according to my doctor) losing muscle mass since I was 30.  If you factor in muscle mass lost due to distance running, the picture is even more bleak. There is no doubt in my mind that I have halted and started to reverse that process.  My back in particular is way stronger than it was.

My mobility is much better than it was.  This, along with the increased strength, should mean I am less prone to injury, especially while working.  Unfortunately for me, I need to keep working… for quite some time. I would also say my back isn’t as perpetually prone to getting stiff and sore as it once was. I would not say it’s a perfect back.

My doctor faithfully tells me that exercise is one of the best remedies for depression.  I’m a firm believer in that.  I think the effect is two-fold.  Exercise releases chemicals in your brain to improve your mental health, and just knowing I’m doing something healthy is a huge dose of good medicine for my mind.  You know that nagging feeling you get like “I need to be doing some kind of exercising”?  Well, I don’t get that.  I do the exercising.

The other big area to consider is what has actually worked for me.

I can lump a lot of my successes in how I defined my goals.  

I could have set unrealistic goals, or goals that lacked quality.  If I had made it a goal to body build, I can tell you it would not have worked.  I’ve known this my whole life because of my body type.  It just doesn't bulk up like other body types, especially at the age of 62.  

However, a goal of building strength was realistic.  It was also a very practical goal.  It’s easy to track strength when you weight train.  That’s one of the things I like about it. Now of course, some toning will occur, but that’s more of a side effect of my main goal, and not the goal itself.

A goal of improving health is also very realistic.  That improvement may come slow, like after a year into this when I saw my bloodwork had mostly remained the same.  Even in that circumstance, I knew for a fact I was healthier than I was a year prior… I had to be.

I had some very unconventional goals as well, things that probably would not occur to you normally.  The best example was a goal that involved Asher.  When we started the Bring Sally Up Challenge, it wasn’t just about the two of us trying to complete the challenge.  It was about the two of us trying to complete the challenge together.  I immediately saw it as an opportunity to relate to Asher.  It was something we could do together… a point of connection. I began to view all of my working out as that – an opportunity to connect to Asher.  It worked, and it still does work.  That connection alone is worthy of the effort, completely apart from health.  I also began to apply this goal to every person I talked to about my health.  My own health and activity was just an excuse to connect with different people who I may have no other point of connection with. I would ask them for input, sure, because I wanted advice, but also because it improved our relationship. Now that is a goal worth having.

Another aspect of goal setting was the size of the goal.  I’ve very carefully described this process for a particular reason – it was a long, slow, gradual process.  I did not one day decide to lose a bunch of weight and do a full body 1 ½ hr workout 3 days a week.  No. It was a series of small steps.   I would build a small habit, and then add to that small habit. I made changes which were realistic and attainable.

To elaborate on habits… I have a lot of routines and habits, some actually good.  Habits and routines make life more efficient.  You do them without having to expend much mental energy.  Good habits and routines make life easier.  I have a good understanding of how to form a good habit.  Basically, you force yourself to do something for a couple of weeks even when you don’t feel like it, and then, if all goes well, you fall into a habit of doing it willingly without thinking much about it.  You even gain pleasure from completing that habit.  Don't believe me?  Consider the pleasure you get from a bad habit.  It's the exact same feeling.  If you carry it too far, you become compulsive and eventually go insane.  The trick is to stop short of that.

I have already discussed all the help I’ve had along the way.  I could not have done this alone.  I would not have wanted to do this alone, because the relationships are half the benefit. I have not even mentioned everyone who helped me, including Tina, my wife, who cooks like a chef with our health always in mind (sometimes to my dismay).

Finally, sometimes I had to ignore the apparent lack of progress.  When I encountered this, I reminded myself of those goals I mentioned before.  I could always put my finger on something I could identify as progress because of the way I had defined my goals.

Goodness.  That’s a LOT of words.  The only thing left is to talk about the future.

I’m 62 years old.  I would like to think I can still grow.  The idea of stagnation is detestable to me. If there are things I can do to improve my physical health, I think it will have a direct impact on my mental health. And if I can maintain or improve my mental health, it allows me to fulfil the God-given role I see myself having.

Really, I am just getting started.  There is so much room for improvement.  I’m still a beginner with weight training.  I still have adjustments I can make with what I eat.  I have things I’d like to learn just based on the concept that as an older person, learning a new skill is good for your brain. I have a book I would like to finish, and a book I would like to start. I have relationships with young people I’d like to build, and relationships with older people that still have room for growth.  None of that can happen if I’m unhealthy, either in body or mind or spirit.

And with that, thank you for coming.

Re-defining an Old Word.

 

We gathered with a little group of folks at sunrise on Easter Morning, April 9, 2023, on the beach in Rehoboth.  The following is what I attempted to share with that group:

We are gathered here to celebrate the resurrection of Christ.  We live every day with the awareness, but we take this one day, get up at the crack of dawn, in the cold, and stand on this beach… to celebrate.

This morning I don’t want to specifically discuss the resurrection, but an idea Jesus communicated after the resurrecton, and just before he left this earth.

Before we get to that, we have to back up a little.

As many of you may know, our daughter Katherine just gave birth to our second grandchild.  When I shared that on Facebook, I mentioned the word “tribe”.  Our tribe had just increased in number, and it is about to increase again when Sarah has her child. I was thinking about this and the word “tribe” at about the time we were considering having this gathering.

So “tribe” is what I want to discuss.

The term “tribe” is familiar to us because of the 12 Tribes of Israel.  The 12 Tribes were the descendants of Abraham, and were a nation of people God promised to Abraham.  Throughout the Old Testament, we see God dealing with this group of people.  The people themselves identified with one tribe.  The concept of tribe was important to them.  Like we would do, they probably viewed their closest connections as their immediate family, then their extended family, then their tribe, and finally the whole nation of Israel.

That is the Old Testament concept of “tribe”.

Fast forward to the New Testament.  The concept of “tribe” doesn’t seem to be mentioned as much in there.  Instead, the focus seems to be on a few basic divisions of people – the Jewish People, their religious leaders, and everybody else - referred to as the Gentiles. But I suspect the concept was never far from their minds.

And along comes Jesus.

Jesus lives among His people and at about the age of 30, His public ministry begins. Then the trouble starts.  The trouble starts because what he preaches isn’t what His people are expecting to hear, especially the religious leaders.

Jesus is eventually killed for what He is preaching. Then, to everyone’s surprise, He is resurrected from death. Safe to say Jesus had a record of being misunderstood. He spends a short time here on earth after the resurrection, and then He gives what we call “The Great Commission.”  It’s found in Matthew 28.

The Great Commission,  Matthew 28

¹⁶ But the eleven disciples proceeded to Galilee, to the mountain which Jesus had designated. ¹⁷ When they saw Him, they worshiped Him; but some were doubtful. ¹⁸ And Jesus came up and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. ^19 [a]Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you ^[b]always, even to the end of the age.”

Now there’s been plenty of teaching about how his followers were to go about this “Great Commission”.  I don’t want to discuss any of that teaching.  Instead, I want say in different words what I think Jesus was getting at.

I think Jesus was basically re-defining the concept of “tribe”.

What do I mean by that?  Part of the problem with God’s people in the New Testament was their insistence on holding onto old things.  They remembered the 12 Tribes in their hey-day, when they were a powerful nation.  In the New Testament, they are no longer powerful, but under the thumb of the Roman Empire. They were waiting for God to restore their power, and once again make them 12 powerful tribes of Israel.

That’s not what Jesus had in mind at all, and that’s basically what got Him killed.

What He DID have in mind was something between God and mankind based on relationship. He wasn’t abandoning the idea of “tribe”, but He was expanding upon it. 

In the Old Testament, people had learned what it meant to be part of a tribe.  They learned what it felt like to be part of a community, to be cared for and blessed by God, to have a direction. But Jesus came along and said “all that served a purpose.  It taught you something, but it wasn’t the end goal.  The end goal is for ALL mankind to come to know God, not just a select group of people.”

And how would this be done?  Easy, just look at what Jesus did.  He lived among His people. He ate with them. He shared in their grief and their happiness.  He walked alongside them. He showed them how to be kind and compassionate.  He sat with people others would NEVER sit with. 

And then He gives this thing we call “The Great Commission”.  What was He saying?

Basically, I think He was saying “Now go out and find your new tribe”.  In other words, go out and live among people just as I have been living among you.  Just as you saw me, be that way to your tribe. Go out, and remembering that love I had for you, and that love you had for your old tribe, give it to your new tribe.

What does this look like?  It means that God will bring us people who become part of our tribe.  We devote ourselves to that tribe.  We live among them, we walk along side them, in the good and bad times. We share our lives together and learn from each other. We become a huge family.

I think we have a history of misidentifying who our tribe is meant to be.  It isn’t just the people who we like, or the people who think exactly like we do. Just like the Jewish people in the New Testament had to do, we have to put aside our old thinking. The longer we’re at this, the easier it becomes for us to see who our tribe is.

And once we see that these folks are part of our tribe, we very naturally, or supernaturally, begin to treat them as such.  We treat them as Christ would.  We find ourselves involved with all kinds of people, just as He did.

Which brings us back to why we are all here this morning.  Yes, it is to celebrate what Jesus did at the Cross, but it’s also about what He asked US to do in response to Him.

My encouragement to you is to go out and consider who your tribe is.  And then devote yourselves to those people.  We can’t devote ourselves to every single person and every single situation… it’s just not realistic.  But I believe that if we are open to the idea, God will bring people into our lives who He intends to be in our tribe.

I don’t know all the specifics of the Great Commission.  But I do know this… as we walk in it, Jesus promised to be with us, always.